John Pinette

When my wife heard John Pinette had died, she said, “He probably told God he was ready to do some ups. He didn’t want to do a down.”

Yep, you get to the Pearly Gates, down is not where you want to go.

And in heaven:

Chinese restaurants are always open. The owner stands on the sidewalk and holds the door open and says, smiling, “You come in now! You stay long time!”

While you are dining, the owner comes to your table and says, “You not eat enough! You eat moah!”

Even when you are full, the owner says, “You not go now! Moah food coming from kitchen!”