Medical stuff

After waking up this morning, I sat up in bed and closed my eyes, intending a minute or so of reflection before fully getting up.

Everything in my head seemed to collapse in on itself, each part separate, although I cannot now describe how the separate parts became so or even what those parts were. The parts just seemed to collapse, to fold back, beginning at the right front, folding back and to the left.

It was very odd, having parts inside my head collapse en masse, yet at the same time become separate pieces. (I have never used the phrase “en masse” before. Sixty-five years of reading and writing, and I never used that phrase. I will consider other common phrases I have not used, although there must be reasons why other common phrases have failed to make their way from mind to fingers. Perhaps I should consider why. Perhaps I should not use the word “perhaps,” but “maybe.”)

A couple of weeks ago my doctor increased my phenytoin by 50 percent, from 200 mg twice daily to 300 mg twice daily. At advice of a pharmacist, the doctor also stopped my Nifedipine, since it and phenytoin are sometimes contraindicated. He replaced Nifedipine with (I’m not certain what), which I had been taking 10 mg at night, but now take 20 mg each morning. I have not noticed any blood pressure problems, only balance problems and blurred vision.

And everything in my head collapsing in on itself.