Quack, quack

Our neighbor has started feeding the (wild) ducks. Three days ago after taking Victor and Charlie out and then letting them back in, I went out with plastic bags to gather the dogs’ leavings. Two ducks swam across the pond, climbed the embankment and walked to within three feet of me.

“What?” I said.

“Quack, quack.” (Duck for ‘Where da food?’)

“I don’t have any food.”

“Quack, quack, quack, quack.” (‘Yu da man. Where da food?’)

“You’re talking to the wrong man. I don’t have any food.”

“Quack, quack, quack.” (‘Yu da man. Man got food.’)

They didn’t believe me. They were still waiting when I walked away.

One of those days I’m sort of glad the alligator left the pond. The neighbor probably has more sense than to feed an alligator. But you never know.

Last week, a story said a Chicago alderman has sent messages to his alders, suggesting they stop feeding coyotes. You feed wild animals, they associate you with food. When you don't have food, you are food.