Funnies

My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went to our local pet shop and they were $75!!! Blow this, I thought, I can get one cheaper off the web.

I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy.

From http://www.theospark.net/

(Spell check red lined "dwarves," suggesting perhaps I meant "wharves." No, I know the difference. However:

("Dwarfs is the standard plural of the noun dwarf. Dwarves is a newer variant popularized (though not invented) by English author J.R.R. Tolkien in his fantasy fiction works, including The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. The Tolkien spelling is appropriate when referring to little people in fantasy worlds." from grammarist.org.)