Or, Paint removal tips.
In Lowe’s today, Priscilla and I got some painting stuff and then went to the floor department to get wax for taking paint from a hardwood floor.
A man and a woman were in the floor department. The man said, “What can I help you with this fine day?”
I made circular motions with my hands and said, “Wax on, wax off.”
“Nineteen-eighty-six,” the man said, laughing. “The year I graduated high school. Now, what can I do for you?”
“We’re looking for floor wax,” my wife said. “We need to get paint off a parquet hardwood floor.”
“Oh, not floor wax,” the man said. “WD-40.”
“Really?” my wife and I said.
“Indeed,” the Lowe’s man said. “WD-40 will take up any oil-base paint.” He looked at my wife’s hands, which were spotted with white paint. “And for that, baby oil. Get in the shower, put on some baby oil, the paint will wash right off.” He gestured at me. “Just let him know, because if he gets in right after you, he’ll slip and fall down.”
So now we know.
I’m beginning to think just about any problem can be fixed with WD-40, Windex and duct tape.