The most intellectual jokes on the internet

I got these.

Because they have nothing to do with philosophy or hard science.

From user disposableaccountass: “Pavlov is sitting at a pub enjoying a pint, the phone rings and he jumps up shouting, ‘Oh s***, I forgot to feed the dog!’ ”

From user Arcadian 5656: “A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting. The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5ft to the left, the chemist takes a shot and misses 5ft to the right, and the statistician yells, ‘We got ‘im!’ ”

From user suid: “So this classics professor goes to a tailor to get his pants mended. The tailor asks, ‘Euripedes?’ The professor replies, ‘Yes. Eumenides?’ ”

From user Watch_Closely: “It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.”

http://www.slate.com/blogs/future_tense/2013/06/28/the_most_intellectual_joke_you_know_an_idiot_s_guide_to_the_reddit_thread.html

(Really, though, the most intellectual joke on the internet is in the topic Things You Will Never Hear a Redneck say: I don’t think you can fix that with duct tape.”)