A threat from the government

I pulled the big envelope from the stack of mail and immediately noticed the return address, all caps and in bold: “U.S. DEPARTMENT OF COMMERCE” and “U.S. CENSUS BUREAU.”

The U.S. does a census every 10 years, I considered. What does the Census Bureau want from me five years after its last intrusive questionnaire?

The envelope contains “The American Community Survey Form” bold letters announced. And for anyone who hesitates: “YOUR RESPONSE IS REQUIRED BY LAW.”

Oh. Is it now.

For citizens who want a peachy-keen explanation, the Census Bureau provides touchy-feely stuff at its web site:

http://www.census.gov/programs-surveys/acs/about.html

There, we of the masses learn: “The American Community Survey (ACS) is an ongoing survey that provides vital information on a yearly basis about our nation and its people. Information from the survey generates data that help determine how more than $400 billion in federal and state funds are distributed each year.

“Through the ACS, we know more about jobs and occupations, educational attainment, veterans, whether people own or rent their home, and other topics. Public officials, planners, and entrepreneurs use this information to assess the past and plan the future. When you respond to the ACS, you are doing your part to help your community plan hospitals and schools, support school lunch programs, improve emergency services, build bridges, and inform businesses looking to add jobs and expand to new markets, and more.”

Should a mass wish to know, those “other topics” are listed here:

http://www.census.gov/programs-surveys/acs/guidance/subjects.html

Just as I was about to put on my “Don’t Tread on Me” hat, I saw that the mandatory, required by law intrusion had been misdelivered. Right house number, wrong street.

Rather than trust USPS, I will take the form to the correct address. I will say to the addressee: This was delivered to me by mistake. I am delivering it to you, so you can give to the government whatever information it so desires without fear of breaking federal law and subsequent arrest. You are welcome.